The Man said, The Cat said



The Man said, The Cat said.


The Man Said...

“Hey, what's that in your mouth?” The cat had something shiny in its' possession. He dropped it in front of me. I picked it up and inspected it. It looked like a gold coin.

“Hey, Honey, take a look at this.” I showed the coin to my wife. She looked at it closely for quite some time.

“Where did this come from?” She asked.

“I simply don't know. The cat had it in it's mouth. Maybe there's more?”
            Her eyes lit up when I said this. I guess she's thinking the same thing I am. I took the coin down to the local coin shop, and sure enough, it was a gold coin. A Spanish Dubloon. When I was told the price for it, I nearly fainted. I thanked the man and went home.

“Honey, this is worth quite a bit of money. If there's more, we are going to be well off. What do you think we should do?”
            “Well, we need to find out where it all is. Or if it was just a fluke. I think you'd better go talk to Robert.”
Robert was the local historian. We lived in a real old house, built in the late 1800's. It a real nice place, quite luxurious. And quite the mortgage on it. It sits on ten acres. Almost all of it is woods. The cat roams it freely, so no telling where he could have dug that up.

I took a drive to Robert's office and had a nice long chat with him about the property. Apparently, it was built by one of the last living pirates, named No Beard. He apparently buried a vast treasure on the property, but no one could ever find it, after searching for close to a century. They finally gave up and sold the place to us. Now I know that there's more. I just got to get that cat to give me the location.

I gave the cat some tuna that evening. After that, he sauntered off to a corner of the room to take a nap. When he woke up, he headed into the back yard. The dog got all excited that I was out there too, so he wanted me to play fetch. I was way too busy for that. The cat went to the edge of the manicured part of the property, and sat down. He then proceeded to lay there and take another nap. This isn't getting me anywhere. I finally gave in and played with the dog for a while. After all, the cat was just napping.

The Cat Said...

I woke up from my beauty sleep and saw that my servant was playing with Him. At first, I thought he was just a big, stupid cat. But he finally told me he's a 'Dug'. Apparently, he has two names, 'Good Boy' and 'Bad Boy'. The male servant can't seem to make up his mind on which one to choose. At least that's what 'Dug' tells me. When my servants speak to me, all I hear is 'Blah, Blah, Blah.' So the 'Dug' tells me what they say. It's a real hassle.

The other day, I was chasing a Flyer and got into the area behind my castle. The Flyer eventually got up in a tree. I tried to tell it to come down and meet me so we could be a little friendly. However, he decided that he was safer up in the tree. Too bad. I thought I had a nice present to give to my Servant. When I started to leave, I noticed a nice shiny thing there in a hole by the tree. I picked it up in my mouth and took it to my servant. He was so happy, he gave me that fishy stuff. I love that fishy stuff.

My Servant got real weird after that. He would follow me into the yard, watching me everywhere I went. I know my servant needs to take care of me, but this is a little ridiculous. So I just wander around, waiting for him to leave.

'Dug' told me that the servant wants more shiny. He heard the servant talking to the other servant. You know, the female one. They told 'Dug' that they needed more shiny to get all kinds of things. 'Dug' didn't say what things they were going to get. Maybe more fishy stuff. I think I'll get him another, then.

The Man said...

Today, the Cat brought yet another coin. I was so happy, I gave him a whole can of tuna. But there's a problem. He doesn't show me where the actual stash is. But I've solved that problem. I bought a GPS tracker and put it on his collar. Now, I just have to track where he goes and I know He'll lead me to it all.

The Cat said...

Today, I followed the Flyer through the woods behind my castle. He took me all around, but he never got close enough to catch. I decided to take a nap after chasing him. When I woke up, it was dark. 'Dug' came up shortly after, and drug me back to the castle. The male Servant took my necklace away and left me with no fishy stuff. That made me mad. I guess I won't get him shinys after all.

The Man said...

I've been looking at the steps the Cat takes for a week now. He's all over the place! And, as far as I can tell, there is no sign of where the coins might be buried. But, I'll never give up. I fed the cat some tuna again, hoping that would motivate him.

The Cat said...

After a nice meal of the fishy stuff, I decided to reward my Servant with more shiny. I took another from the spot and put it in his shoe. I'm sure he'll be happy about it.

The Man said...

A week passed, and still no coins. I am getting real fed up with this cat. However, I will still keep up with it. After all, my fortune is out the somewhere!

When I woke up today, I put on a pair of sneakers I use in the yard. When I did, I felt something inside. It was another coin! I hurriedly got the tracker off the cat and checked where he went. After eliminating all of the places he had been before, I noticed a week before he was near a large tree in the center of our woods. I hadn't been there yet. I took a shovel and went to the tree. I didn't have to even dig. The coins were in a hollow right at the base. Apparently, there had been a rather heavy rain that cleared the spot for us.

I took the coins in the house and my wife and I counted them. There were 1268. It meant that we wouldn't have to work ever again. What a joyous day this is.

Then it all fell apart. Robert showed up at my house a couple days later and had a woman with him. She was older, around 60, and had long, gray hair. I asked Robert why he was here.

“I asked around. According to the coin man in town, you had a coin that was from a stash here on the property. I assume you've found it , then?”
            “Well, I guess you could say that. But, why do you care? It's ours, after all. It was on our property.”

“You forgot about the clause in your contract. This is Mary Steem. She's the last living relative of No Beard. So, she's here to collect.”

I was flabbergasted. After all of this, we get nothing? But, she apparently decided to 'be nice' and give us 10%. I guess it's better than nothing. We used our portion to pay down our mortgage. It shaved half off. I continued to give the Cat tuna after that. After all, he did do his job.

The Cat said...

I finally did it! I caught that stupid Flyer. I am so proud of myself. I know this is much better than any shiny. I left it on the table in the place where the Servants eat. I'm sure they will be pleased. After all of that, I decided to get my beauty sleep. After all, I need to maintain my body. My servants are going to need me around for a long, long time.


Daric Robert Lennard


Daric Robert Lennard is the author of "My Name is Berta", a children's book. He lives in Pennsylvania with his wife and adult daughter. He daydreams of finding Spanish Dubloons in his backyard.

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